It's been a fun year, hasn't it? I
can't remember much of it since the "incident", which I can't
remember what was either, but I'm told that stuff happened. It's
been an emotional rollercoaster for me with ups and downs, a lot of
screaming, being strapped in tight most of the time, and an unusual
amount of it spent hanging upside down.
If you are leaving uni now, going on to
graduating and bigger and better (or smaller and worse depending on
your level of ambition) things, then I guess congratulations on not
failing. Clearly I'm no good at goodbyes, so I'll stop now. Let
me instead look back at the things that I have learnt this year.
I've learnt that people would rather
bitch to me about their problems via letters than actually do
something about them themselves.
I've learnt that New Zealand
television continues to get worse each passing week with every "new"
stolen idea from other countries getting increasingly desperate.
I've learnt that people are still
stupid and nothing will ever change that, and also being a cynical
elitist just makes me madder about it.
I've learnt that most people cannot
distinguish between realist (someone who looks at everything
rationally, i.e. what I am) with a pessimist (someone who is just
always negative and a complete buzz kill, i.e. Neil in the Young
Ones). However, the distinction between optimist and idiot is much
closer.
I've learnt that stereotyping and
degrading people to either "idiot" or "stupid" does wonders
for my ego.
I've learnt that being married to a
Hollywood movie star is just as awesome as you think it would be.
I've learnt that it's possible to
do my job with the bare minimum of effort and interest.
I've learnt that I can only ingest 3
glasses of wine before the entire world stops spinning except for me.
I've learnt that no matter how hard I
try or how drunk I get, I will never be a great singer.
I've learnt that steak knives are not
good substitutes to cut your toenails with when you can't find
clippers or scissors.
I've come to live with the fact that
The Simpsons will never be great again.
I've learnt that Mad Men is the most
pretentious show ever made and that TV critics will fawn over
anything if the sets are cool enough.
I've learnt how amazingly awesome
Watchmen is and advise all of you to read it right now. Well, after
you've finished reading this of course.
But the main thing I've learnt this
year is that being editor can be fun, exhausting, enraging, pleasant,
rewarding, agitating, educational, and depressing all within the
space of a few hours on a Thursday. If I'm being honest, I'm glad
it's over. This job, for all the great opportunities it allows and
fun I had doing it, can be very stressful at times, and since I am a
worrybot I think it has taken 23 years off my life. Now I'll only
make it to 117.
I, like you guys about now, need a
break from all the rush of doing stuff week after week. We only have
4 days to research, write, edit, and design everything in our
magazine, plus we don't get given topics to write about like most
of you. I don't want sympathy or anything (I know none's coming
anyway), I just want people to understand that naturally there will
be flaws, there will be filler, and there will be felines (sorry I
needed another F, but I will note the lack of cats in debate and make
up for that next year).
But anyway, I hope we have provided
some form of entertainment over the year, that was my primary goal
and I think it has been achieved. If you disagree, clearly you're
way too fussy and have no functioning sense of humour. So have some
fun exams, a good Christmas, and a kick ass New Years. I don't have
plans yet, so if you have a spare spot in your tent let me know.
This issue of debate will look back
over the year a little bit, and what better way to start than
enjoying a collection of pictures that have graced page 4 in 2008 by
turning your head ever so slightly to the right.
Love,
Ryan
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