Over the much deserved holiday I
noticed a trend of the romantically inclined that seemed more than
coincidence, and somewhat extreme...
It seemed that almost all of my close
friends were/are either a) getting engaged, b) getting pregnant or c)
getting dumped. And apparently this has stretched quite far; having
asked friends of friends, acquaintances and even complete randoms
(sorry randoms, I told you I wasn't crazy, this is the column of
proof). In all fairness, the break ups are well exceeding the
future unions and up-the-duffers, to the point where the causal
drinks with all of your couple friends have turned into binge
drinking sessions ending in plans of total world domination, hot sex
with the forbidden flatmate and running to the south island with your
new lesbian lover (all true instances). Take a minute out of your day
and count how many of your friend have recently experienced a, b or
c?
Slightly concerned slash creeped out? I
certainly am, so to reiterate; there is definitely something in the
water.
The running trend is (usually) that
after the chilly months of winter have passed and the use of an
inbuilt hot water bottle is no longer needed, couples break up in
hopes of achieving the ultimate hot summer lovin'. So why is it,
that in the weeks of late, people in relationships have gone home via
spiltsville? Winter is nowhere near over yet and who can afford the
electricity of permanent, convenient bed warmth? Who is going to stay
home with you to snuggle up and watch DVDs on Friday and Saturday
night with when the weather is way too shit bucket to go out? Have
comfort in knowing that all the newly single friends, who were
previously caught in lovers land, will be in the same spot. So what
is the game plan then?
It seems that new beginnings are
definitely on the horizon. Blondes are going brunette, boys are
finally getting rid of their I-am-a-man-look-at-me-go beards (thank
Christ, say no to facial hair) and new strategies are emerging. Some
would call this a mid-degree crisis and to be honest, I think the
impending change is going to bring a lot of good will, good spirits,
and who knows, maybe even good assignment marks. Touch wood.
So if you have been dumped/ fallen
preggers/ got preliminarily tied to the ball and chain, take some
time out and consider what is going on in the world around you. There
has been freak weather, freaky people locking others in cellars, and
other mindless acts of criminal behaviour. And what has caused this?
Maybe global warming is to blame? Maybe it is a lashing of good or
bad karma making itself known. Or maybe it is just fate. But whatever
it is, hopefully it sorts itself out soon and we all be facing happy
endings. But personally, I blame the water.
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