Boobs on Bikes 2008


Last Wednesday about 100,000 dirty perving Aucklanders filled up Queen St like a big multicultural sponge, soaking up mud off the carpet. debate was there representing the morally decent portion of society, standing up for what is good and right. Haha, boobs.  ‘Boobs on Bikes' is an annual parade that acts as an advertising prequel to the Erotica expo. It basically consists of a whole pile of strippers, porn stars and some amateur flashers rolling down Queen St on motorbikes with their tits out, and here we were thinking advertising was a complex game. The fact that more people showed up to see the parade than they can fit in the Birdsnest in Beijing indicates that there's definitely a pull factor in ‘Breast Marketing', but is it advertising with no social responsibility?

The Human Rights Foundation and the Auckland Women's Centre piloted a little parade of their own ahead of the boobs, with the lovely catchphrase "Porn Fuels Rape". Their parade was pretty shitty compared to the real one, and there were definitely not as many boobs shown (if any).

In all seriousness, the protest parade sucked. There was no music and they just had signs up with angry phrases about pornography fuelling sexual violence. They didn't have a float, there was nobody smiling AND they had the audacity to look at everyone with sad, disappointed faces as though we were a detriment to society. Their best achievement was scoring free advertising that they'd otherwise be incapable of getting. Freeloaders.

The actual parade was, to be honest, below average. There were a number of topless women, but there weren't many ATTRACTIVE topless women, actually there weren't any attractive people full stop, men and women alike. The parade didn't really advertise the Erotica expo that well, there wasn't an excessive amount of signage and to be honest research was needed it to find out that it was actually advertising it at all. Pretty rubbish excuse for advertising and it leaves you wondering whether the parade was just an excuse to show boobs in public in an attempt to piss people off and promote NZ porn mogul Steve Crow.

When you're left in the middle of a busy street, surrounded by throngs of sweaty perverts with their camera phones and thinking to yourself "Why are the topless women coming down the road at me on Harley's?", something has gone wrong. It's not fair to judge anyone in this situation, protestors or strippers. Whenever something new happens, someone will complain. This time it's boobs.

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